you need protection from the physical art of conversation...

I didn't post about this earlier because I suck. One of my favorites, the voice I consider to be my kind of soul--Teddy Pendergrass--died several days ago. He's always been in my top five artists of all time, one of those musicians I would never want to live without. His death makes me so sad. :-( I almost cried when I found out. Then again, that could also be in part due to my effed up emotions lately.

Teddy, I will miss you so much. ♥



( more teddy )

+ The gloomy winter days in this area of the country make me want to slit my wrists. No, not really. But I do long for sun and warmer temperatures. The past few days have been somewhat nice with temperatures in the 40's, so I took the opportunity to go walking with Ferugons. I could not stay inside any longer. Spring, please? Pictures (i.e. evidence I can now venture outside of the house for things other than work) are below.

( snow and icicles and the cutest dog ever )

+ I totally watched movies this weekend that Jason would never agree to view with me. And I enjoyed them, knowing that what he is being forced to watch will be much worse. I hope he likes High School Musical and Hannah Montana. So much for being a thirty-five year old man. You think I jest, but I don't. G.I. Joe was bad, but I enjoyed Christopher Eccleston being oh-so-smug and dangerously sexy. Also, the amount of Snake Eyes/OFC fanfic is disturbingly large when the rest of the fandom is taken into consideration. It wouldn't be so bad if the fics weren't so... well, bad.

+ I've made $360 selling books, CDs, and DVDs in the past two weeks. Of course, $150 of that went to paying for postage, but that's still a fairly good haul. I still feel like a have a gazillion items I need to get rid of, but I plan on having most of it cleaned out by the summer.

+ I am knitting this pulloever at the moment. I'm using a slightly different yarn--Nashua Brushed Alpaca--and knitting the one in the round without the closure. The bottom five inches (which is all I've managed to finish) are gorgeous and oh-so-soft. I'm excited about the finished product. Also, I am participating in the 2010 Ravelympics. Everyone will choose a project (or two) that they feel will challenge them, but will be possible to complete in two weeks. Cast-on is during the opening ceremony of the 2010 Winter Olympics. We'll all be knitting as we watch coverage of the Olympics. I've already chosen my two projects, but I need to pick up the yarn still.

You guyyyyyyys...

I found my Edward. Not dumb Edward from Twilight. Edward from the Anita Blake Vampire Hunter novels. Assassin extraordinaire. I've always had a very good idea of what my Edward looked like because he has always been my favorite ABVH character. And now I've found an actor for him. Yay!

Because I totally have no life right now, I flipped on the television to watch Human Target this evening. Dangerous, witty, and cavalier man who saves the day? Yes, please. Jackie Earl Haley as a regular. YES, please. I thought I might die from the awesome. Anyway, it's the first time I've actually bothered to try and watch a show as it airs in years. So, I'm watching and what do I see? EDWARD. My Edward. The way I always imagined him.

( you can't handle the hawt )

Mark Valley, where have you been my whole life. Obviously, one of us has been hiding under a rock, and it was probably me. ::squees with fangirlish enthusiasm::

Title: Turn My Wooden Heart (Chapter 13/13 and Epilogue)
Author: anogete
Characters/Pairings: Nine/Rose
Genre: Action/Adventure, Romance
Rating: Adult, NC-17 (eventually)
Beta: Wibbling about on my own without a beta for the time being.
Summary: The Doctor and Rose find themselves wrapped up in a war between two tribes of people. As they sort out the conspiracy surrounding this war, they begin to question their feelings for one another.
Disclaimer: I certainly don't own anyone or anything associated with Doctor Who, but I do enjoy playing with Nine and Rose. ::pets them::
A/N: This fic is thirteen chapters with a short epilogue, and it is nearly complete, but I have been a complete boob by not posting as promised. 2009 was a crap year for me, so we're hoping that 2010 will be much better.

Previous Chapters: Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 || Chapter 7 || Chapter 8 || Chapter 9 || Chapter 10 || Chapter 11 || Chapter 12

( chapter 13 )


( epilogue )

Title: Turn My Wooden Heart (Chapter 12/13)
Author: anogete
Characters/Pairings: Nine/Rose
Genre: Action/Adventure, Romance
Rating: Adult, NC-17 (eventually)
Beta: Wibbling about on my own without a beta for the time being.
Summary: The Doctor and Rose find themselves wrapped up in a war between two tribes of people. As they sort out the conspiracy surrounding this war, they begin to question their feelings for one another.
Disclaimer: I certainly don't own anyone or anything associated with Doctor Who, but I do enjoy playing with Nine and Rose. ::pets them::
A/N: This fic is thirteen chapters with a short epilogue, and it is nearly complete, but I have been a complete boob by not posting as promised. 2009 was a crap year for me, so we're hoping that 2010 will be much better.

Previous Chapters: Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 || Chapter 7 || Chapter 8 || Chapter 9 || Chapter 10 || Chapter 11

( chapter 12 )

Title: Turn My Wooden Heart (Chapter 11/13)
Author: anogete
Characters/Pairings: Nine/Rose
Genre: Action/Adventure, Romance
Rating: Adult, NC-17 (eventually)
Beta: Wibbling about on my own without a beta for the time being.
Summary: The Doctor and Rose find themselves wrapped up in a war between two tribes of people. As they sort out the conspiracy surrounding this war, they begin to question their feelings for one another.
Disclaimer: I certainly don't own anyone or anything associated with Doctor Who, but I do enjoy playing with Nine and Rose. ::pets them::
A/N: This fic is thirteen chapters with a short epilogue, and it is nearly complete, but I have been a complete boob by not posting as promised. 2009 was a crap year for me, so we're hoping that 2010 will be much better.

Previous Chapters: Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 || Chapter 7 || Chapter 8 || Chapter 9 || Chapter 10

( chapter 10 )

Title: Turn My Wooden Heart (Chapter 10/13)
Author: anogete
Characters/Pairings: Nine/Rose
Genre: Action/Adventure, Romance
Rating: Adult, NC-17 (eventually)
Beta: Wibbling about on my own without a beta for the time being.
Summary: The Doctor and Rose find themselves wrapped up in a war between two tribes of people. As they sort out the conspiracy surrounding this war, they begin to question their feelings for one another.
Disclaimer: I certainly don't own anyone or anything associated with Doctor Who, but I do enjoy playing with Nine and Rose. ::pets them::
A/N: This fic is thirteen chapters with a short epilogue, and it is nearly complete, but I have been a complete boob by not posting as promised. 2009 was a crap year for me, so we're hoping that 2010 will be much better.

Previous Chapters: Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 || Chapter 7 || Chapter 8 || Chapter 9

( special note from moi and a recap )

( chapter 10 )

Last night I was thinking that Christopher Eccleston looks deviously delicious as the baddie in the G.I. Joe movie, and I should probably watch it, despite it being a... well, G.I. Joe movie and all. And then I remembered I don't have to worry about what Jason enjoys watching or not, and I can do whatever the hell I please. That's nice. He can play daddy to his pathetic little pseudo-girlfriend and help her get her G.E.D. and driver's license since she was too much of a loser to actually attend high school classes. I'm being a bitch, but I think it's warrented when some little upstart comes along and plays the damsel-in-distress card in an effort to undermine a long-term relationship of mine. I deserve a free pass every once in a while to be childish about this thing. The mens, I hates them right now. I plan on being quite selfish for a spell and not allowing any men to get too close because I totally don't want to have to compromise my life and plans to accomodate someone else. There's an Elvis Costello song in which he writes about a girl who "wears a wedding ring her sister lent to throw them off the scent." Perhaps I'll do that.

Also, I really, really, really am tempted to sign up for this super awesome virtual season of Doctor Who staring Nine and Rose. Because despite the fantastic seasons with David Tennant, I still long for the days spent with Nine. I'm just concerned that I would not be able to get myself in the right headspace to write an episode. I might wait until tonight to see how many people bite and determine whether they need more authors. But, boy, would I love to write the scary episode, even though I have no idea what sort of plot I could come up with.

Also, I'm a complete slacker for not posting the last bit of the damn Nine/Rose story I wrote last year. I promise to do so before the weekend is out. The final two or three chapters are un-beta'd, but I'm going to post away because I can't be bothered. That's horrible, but if I fiddle around with it too much, then it won't get posted.

I've been absent from Ravelry for quite some time, but I'm trying to update my account and my project list. If you're a knitter/crocheter, then sign up and friend me on there. My name there is the same as here--anogete. It's a great way to connect with other crafty folks, but it has other more practical uses. I had a skein of mohair-ish Nashua Brushed Alpaca, so I looked it up on Ravelry and found a list of 125 projects other people have completed with it. I was able to find something I like and wouldn't have thought of otherwise.

My Profile

Eff this cold weather and snow. It's absolutely disgusting. I feel like I'm in a prison, unable to venture outside beyond my damn car. I long for warm spring days and crisp summer mornings.

Eating about six hundred calories a day works wonders for losing weight. I've lost ten pounds. No, I'm not developing an eating disorder, though if I were a weaker person, then I'd be tempted. I just don't feel like eating much after all the emotional trauma, and now I'm stomach has shrunk and eating an apple makes me feel stuffed. One day I'll be healthy again, and I'll have to take Ferguson on jogs each morning or evening in order to lose anything. Which I totally plan on doing. Hopefully this spring when I have a shiny new job.

I took the plunge last night and sent two resumes via e-mail. I also printed out a resume to snail mail to a law firm. Before going into the office today, I spoke to my contact at the temp agency and explained the situation to her. She told me she thought I was handling things well and did not have any other suggestions. She actually jumped at the chance to place me in a full-time position, but I begged off and told her I would contact her in a couple weeks if I'm still looking. I told the woman I work with that I've begun looking for another job, but I still need to speak to the treasurer and, potentially, the executive committee. I feel bad about leaving them, but I really think this decision is best for me and for my career. Secretarial work at a local church really doesn't look stellar on a resume, especially when the rest of my resume shows that I have much more experience than that. Anyway, the woman in the office made me promise I would come to the Shrove Tuesday pancake dinner even if I'm not working there at the time. I agreed. What else am I going to do around here? I've been reduced to going to church dinners.

All of the upheaval and emotional turmoil in my life has made me reevaluate who I am and what is important to me. And this contemplation has led to purging my life of many of my possessions. When I moved to Charleston, I had nine boxes of books and four boxes of CDs. I took a step back from my beloved books and CDs to really think about what makes me happy. Books don't make me happy, the stories do. CDs don't make me happy, the music does. And why do I feel as though I need a tangible library of books I've read or music I listen to in order to define myself? I really don't. So, I decided to shake that elephant from my back and sell most of my books and CDs. I kept less than one hundred CDs and placed the artwork booklets and discs in a large CD wallet. I kept three boxes of books that are terribly special to me or are ones I have not yet read. My aim is to be able to house all of my books, CDs, and personal documents on my five-shelf bookcase, and I think that's a reasonable goal.

Over the past three days, I've separated what I want to keep from what I want to sell. I have listed 200 CDs on Half.com for sale. All of the songs I wanted to keep are safely loaded on iTunes and backed up on DVD-RW discs. And then I listed about 150 books. After the sales slow down and summer rolls around, I am going to take the remaining books and CDs to used stores to rid myself of them for good. I've already made over a hundred in sales in just the last three days. Prices are cheap, so if you think I might have something you'd like, you can view my 'shop' right here.

Today, I went through two boxes of records and files that belong to Jason and I. I boxed his up to mail to his mother so she can pass them on to him. He left his checks, car title, tax information, everything here with me. As for my stuff, I tossed most of the old records I no longer need. I kept a small stack of stuff (medical records for Ferguson and I, car maintenance records, birth certificate, etc) and placed it in a single accordion folder.

This is the first step I can take toward bettering my life. I don't need so many things to define myself or make me happy. They are simply boxes of items I lug around to show I know about things. And if I decide I want to move to another city in a year or two, then this can only help me by reducing the number of things I'll have to move.

Next up? I need to go over to the house we were living in and pack up the kitchen items and linens/towels for storage. I'll also need to pack up the food in the fridge and pantry to bring over here to my grandmother's. Once that is done, I'll be ready to call in reinforcements to move my furniture and a few boxes of kitchen items into storage. All in all, it shouldn't be too much. I have a queen-size bed, a dresser, a chest of drawers, a lingerie chest, two end tables, chair with ottoman, a sofa, a tv stand, and a kitchen table with four chairs. My bookshelf and treadmill are coming over here to live with me. Progress.

Shit happens and you reevaluate your life and what you're doing with it. I'm getting rid of things I no longer need to streamline my world.

I don't know if there are any X-Files fans on my flist, but I have some X-Files stuff I would like to exit my life, but I don't want to throw it away. I also don't want to deal with eBay auctions. So, the crap is listed below. It's all circa 1996, which is when I was like-totally-completely in love with Mulder and obsessively collected X-Files stuff. This is the stuff that has survived the years.

Comic #1--Numbered Special Edition (good condition)
Comic #5 (great condition)
Comic #8 (great condition)
Universe Magazine--September 1996 (great condition)
Starlog Presents The X-Files and Other Eerie TV (good condition)
The X-Files Magazine #1 (great condition)
The X-Files Magazine #2 (great condition)
The X-Files 1996 Wall Calendar (good condition)
100+ X-Files trading cards in the Topps binder (great condition)

If you want it, you can have it ALL for FREE. Just pay me what it costs to ship it to you (in a flat rate box, probably between 9 and 12 dollars). Leave me a comment if you're interested. I'm waiting to hear back from an X-Files community to see if I can make a post there, but I thought I'd give my flist first dibs.

It's all going to be over tomorrow. Jason is coming by with the U-Haul and leaving my life. When I think about it, I feel sick to my stomach. I will not barf. I will not barf.

On the flip side of things? Getting rid of all this shit feels good. I'll post about that in more detail at a later date when my head is clearer.

Life just sucks. It makes me want to continuously eat sleeping pills so I can remain unconscious.

The last day of the 30-day meme. My fancy is tickled by a recipe.

Day 30 → Whatever tickles your fancy

( nom nom nom )

This commercial was rated one of the most offensive of the year. It was pulled off the air after many complaints. I, however, think it is hilarious. Especially the big sud that asks for the loofah.

Day 29 → Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days

Recently, there was an LJ community spotlighted called i_hope_that. In each post, people began things with, "I hope that..." and then filled in what their hope was. So, I'm going to use that format here. Do I think I will get all my druthers? No, but I can always hope.

I hope that I can learn to place more trust in Jason than I feel able to right now.
I hope that my dog treat and custom knitting business does modestly well online.
I hope that my health and the health of all my loved ones and friends will hold up.
I hope that I can lose the twenty pounds I've gained this past year.
I hope that I can find that ability to savor and enjoy things like I once did.
I hope that I will be able to write fic again, even if it isn't fantastic fic.
I hope that there will be a good deal of time for reading great books.
I hope that spring comes soon so I can get out of the house more often.
I hope that I can be happy here in West Virginia and not miss Albuquerque so much.
I hope that I can learn to stick with the budget I've set for myself instead of smudging the lines.

I'm a fan of Once and Glen Hansard, but I've been slow on the uptake with music lately. I finally got hold of The Swell Season's most recent album, Strict Joy. There is a video of YouTube of a half hour performance they did for NPR. I've embedded the first song below because it is quite lovely.



If you'd like more of Marketa's voice and song writing, then you can listen to Fantasy Man from the same session. Or you can get goosebumps (like me) by listening to the encore, a song from the previous album.

Day 28 → This year, in great detail
Gosh, I really don't care to get into this mess. The past year has been very difficult for me. Maybe I'll look back on it and realize it gave me character and taught me things about myself and those around me. Right now, I wish I could wipe the slate clean and start 2009 over again with some adjustments. Unfortunately, you can't do that, so I'll just have to deal with the aftermath as is. So, I'm not going to go into great detail. Anyone who cares pretty much knows how this year was for me, and that's really all that matters, I think.

Day 27 → This month, in great detail

( answer, not in great detail )

Jason and I saw Avatar at the theater today. It was quite satisfying, and I really enjoyed it. If you're looking for a good movie to see, then I rec it.

ALSO, does anyone have any ideas or recipes for healthy dinners? Preferably, I'd like something that doesn't require expensive foods or a gazillion items one doesn't normally stock her pantry with. Jason and I are going to try to eat a bit healthier this coming year--or at least, I am--and I'm stick of eating the same old things.

Day 26 → Your week, in great detail

These were the handful of days in this meme I wasn't looking forward to doing.

( terribly boring )

And now for a Christmas joke that is terribly bad and geeky, but made me laugh...

Day 25 → Your day, in great detail

No one wants to read about my day in great detail.

My alarm when off at 6:30 am, but I hit the snooze for ten minutes. Finally got up and readied myself for work. Got gas and dropped by the grocery store for a few last minute items before they close for Christmas. Arrived at work just before 8:00 am and proceeded to procrastinate and make a post on LJ before actually trying to do any work. Also microwaved a frozen cheese omelet I bought at the grocery. It wasn't so great. Reviewed the financial information for the upcoming audit next year for most of the morning, and then decided to play games online until 1:00 pm. Left at 1:00 pm and came home. Jason and I left to get sandwiches for a late lunch as soon as I got home, and then we went to PetSmart to see if they had any good dog Christmas presents for Ferguson. It was a bust, so we ended up back at home lounging about. I wrapped the last two Christmas presents, and Jason searched everywhere for his grey hat. He didn't find it, but we did leave around 4:30 pm to go to my parents' house for Christmas Eve. My parents wanted to have festivities early because of my brothers. Don't ask; totally don't feel like talking about it. We watched part of Star Wars (the icky remastered one) while listening to my grandfather complain about how China makes everything nowadays and my father talk about really bad sitcoms that he loves. I had macaroni and cheese with some crackers, raw veggies, and fruit. Jason had horribly greasy meatballs that I told him he would regret. We all opened our presents, which is tradition in my family. Presents are always opened on Christmas Eve for some reason. We chatted for another hour or so, and then left just after 7:30 pm. We're home now. Jason is, as I predicted, regretting the meatballs. I'm looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow. I'm also looking forward to my grandmother's green beans for Christmas dinner. Jason is underwhelmed by the idea of having ham, which is the other thing on the menu. I had a anxiety moment earlier in the day after lunch which pretty much wiped me out completely. I ran on fumes while I was at my parents' house, and now I'm just ready to crawl into bed and stare at the wall. Which is what I'm going to do once I post this.